Something has stirred the slumbering memories of Ellie's ordeal this morning. Now roused from their slumber, these memories have flooded my mind. Ellie is never truly off of my mind. I carry her memory close to my heart, but I don't think about the hospital or doctors or surgeries much anymore. A tired heart has turned to melancholy as I relive each moment in my mind. The sense of loss is still profound, but the hurt has subsided. It is like a limp in my soul. The initial pain has passed, but the evidence of the injury is inescapable.
It is not that I am without hope. We gave Ellie the middle name "Grace" to remind us of the grace of God. We gave Sophia the middle name "Hope" to remind us that we can always hope in the Lord. The Lord has comforted me with his gracious care and caused me to hope in him. I am remembering Ellie's smile. It was a slight upward turn at one corner of her mouth, but powerful to see. I praise the Lord for etching her smile so deeply in my memory. I find it comforting.
I am also remembering that the Lord has blessed me with another beautiful daughter. She has her own unique smile. It is powerful too. It reminds that the Lord has richly blessed me, and my hope is not in vain.
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