A Pleasant Reminder

Have you ever felt like a complete and utter failure? Does it ever feel like your life has been wasted? Do you ever wonder if God has washed his hands of you? Although it pains me to say it, I wrestle these feelings more often than I care to admit. Feelings are funny things. Although they are real in the sense that we genuinely feel them, they don't always express reality. For example, you could be sitting a crowded room surrounded by friends, and still feel lonely. You "feel" all alone, but that isn't actually the case.

We don't always perceive our value. God has demonstrated his love toward us; it is unquestionable (see Rom. 5:6-10). Yet we don't always feel loved. I was recently reminded of God's love again. A few days ago, I drove passed an apartment complex where I used to hangout before I came to know the Lord. In fact, it was a place where one of the darkest moments of my life occurred. I'm convinced that I came close to dying one night in the parking lot of that apartment complex. I don't remember what that complex used to be called, but as I past I noticed a sign that said, "Providence Place."

I have known for a long time that God brought me through that destructive phase of my life, but I could help but marvel at that sign. There was literally a sign marking the spot where providence had spared my life. I don't want to read to much into it, but I find it intriguing. The sign, although not made for me or with me in mind, was used by God to confirm, once more, his unquestionable love for me.

It felt like he was saying, "I wasn't through with you then and there, and I'm not through with you here and now." But the truth is I don't need a sign. I have the Scripture. Paul said, "For God's gifts and his call are irrevocable" (Rom. 11:29). If they are irrevocable for Israel, even in their rebellion, how can they be revoked from us whom the Spirit has made alive? Paul also said,

Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through him! For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we now received reconciliation (Rom. 5:9-11).

 That sign reminded me of the truth from a truer source. Seeing the "Providence Place" sign was like a catalyst. It caused me to retrace the steps of my journey, but this time I didn't focus on all of my missteps. This time I focused on the unseen hand of God that brought out of the darkness and into the light. Instead of feeling the shame of my past, I saw the love of God. The love that rescued me then hasn't lost any of its potency.

If you feeling down, I hope that you recognize the signs of God's love that are surrounding you at this moment. If you look closely enough, you will find God's fingerprints all over you life. He has loved and will continue to love you with an everlasting love. You may not feel it, but it doesn't mean his love is not real. Anchor yourself in the truth of his Word, and you'll weather your stormy feelings.

His Steadfast Love

"He sent out his word and healed them, and delivered them from their destruction.  Let them thank the Lord for his steadfast love, for his wondrous works to the children of men" (Ps. 107:20-21).

The psalmist calls us to give thanks and praise for the steadfast love of the LORD (Ps. 107:1).  This is a psalm reminding the redeemed of the Lord of his infinite praiseworthiness. The Lord has delivered them from all of their troubles, even the troubles that they have brought upon themselves by their wanton waywardness. He does this because his love, unlike their love, is steadfast.

The Lord's steadfast love is rock solid.  It is unbreakable.  His love is an attribute of his character, and thus, it is infinite, holy, perfect, and true.

Were we not the objects of his love, our situation would be hopeless.  Our wayward hearts would lead us farther and farther from his loving embrace.  We would flee his love, like we were running from destruction itself.  But his love pursues us, it surrounds us, and it holds us captive.

The people mentioned in Psalm 107:20-21, were "fools through their own ways, and because of their iniquities suffered affliction" (Ps. 107:17).  They were knocking at death's door, because the rejected God's provision.  Yet, God sends out his word and heals them.

In these words, we see grace displayed.  He isn't rescuing those who are looking for him.  He is conquering his enemies with his love.  They are locked in their rebellion to the point of death, and yet, he nurses them back to life.

The Word of Christ brings healing as the Spirit works faith in the believer.  The poison of rebellion is slowly drawn from the sin-wounded heart, through the process of sanctification.  Every day that Spirit seeks to apply the healing balm of the Word to our sin-sick hearts.  Through the gospel, we have been brought back from death to life, but while we live in this body sins poison still affects us.

But God has sent out his Word, and it will not return unto him void.  It will accomplish what he wills.  We can say with Paul, "I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion on the day of Jesus Christ" (Phil. 1:6).

With this confidence, a gratitude must flow forth from us.  Reflection upon the overflowing graciousness of God's steadfast love should drive us to thankfulness.  God's praise should forever be upon our lips, because of Christ's death and resurrection.  He loved us when we were enemies, he made us his own, and now he should be the object of our greatest adoration and gratitude.  Love him, thank him, because he first loved you.

Confidence at the Crossroads of Life

Do you ever have the feeling that you are at a crossroads in your life?  It may be that the deep inside of you a tempest of doubt is raging.  Maybe you feel drained of passion or hope.  Maybe you feel that you have completely botched your life, and you want to consign the last several years of your life to a dustbin somewhere.  Even if you can't identify the cause, you recognize the fact that you are facing a turning point.

At a fork in the road, where the destination of either path is unknown, it is often easy to allow fear to paralyze you.  What if you make the wrong choice?  What if the path your chose is too hard?  What if? What if? What if? is always the refrain.

The message of the gospel strips fear of its power.  Fear preys on your natural inclinations; it manipulates your inherent paranoia. Fear is a lie sculpted in barbwire.  It snags you deep in the soul, and embeds itself deep.  Fear manifests itself in various ways in different people.  Most of us fear something, but the gospel uproots all lies.

This uprooting doesn't always happen overnight.  As we grow and mature, the Spirit enables us to see more place we need to apply the gospel in our lives.  He continually moves us to not only persevere in the faith, but to advance in it.  As the Spirit brings about growth in us, he reveals to us areas that are still not under Christ's lordship.

When we find ourselves at a crossroads in our life, it is wise to ask if this is the Spirit's way of bringing us more fully under the lordship of Christ.  The crossroads should be a place of intense prayer and contemplation, they should never be a place of fear.

The gospel teaches us that we are always accepted before God the Father, through Christ Jesus the Son, as demonstrated by the Spirit's presence in our life.  God loves us: not for what we can do for him (he doesn't need anyone or anything), not because of what we do for him, but simply because that is who God is.  If we take the wrong turn, whether in misguided faith or in disobedience, God will correct our path.  We are his because he is pleased to delight in us.  With this in mind, let us face the crossroads of our life with confidence in God's undeniable love and step out in faith.

Learning to Love

How do you love some one who doesn't love his/her self?  What is the proper Christian response to self-destructive behavior?  What if rebuke and correction are not taking root?  What if you have tried kindness and patience, but you feel you are about out of both?

Some situations in life are so complicated and frustrating.  There are no easy answers, at least none that satisfy the heart bent on honoring God.  The Lord would not be pleased if we went around conking heads together.

Instead, we must turn to the Lord in a spirit of prayer.  We must pray as if lives were at stake, because they are. We must exercise patience while we pray for the strength to endure.  We must trust the Lord to help us bear up under the load of our circumstance.

Another thing we must do is to stay the course.  We keep caring.  We keep speaking the truth in love.  We keep hoping for the sun to rise on another day for those wayward sheep.  We cry out to the holy God, who rescued us from our sin, that he would deliver them from theirs.

Love can't "throw in the towel."  Love never says die.  Love must continue to plod along, steady and straight. We must try to see ourselves in their shoes, and love them like we would want to be loved.  All the while, we should be asking God to love them through us, and to teach us to love them like he does.

I Yearn for More

We didn't have to pass through security checkpoints today.  There were no mad dashes through airports.  We weren't afraid we would miss our flight, and have to find another one, because Homeland Security was backed up.  And I didn't get have refried black beans and fried bananas with my breakfast this morning.  No, January 9th, 2010 wasn't much like January 9th, 2009.

Today, we moved at an easier pace.  We enjoyed each others company.  We played a little.  We watched a little t.v.  We even went out and played in the snow for a while today.  Things that we anticipated and longed for have now faded into routine.  Time has whirled passed us, and a year is gone.  Sophia is home, and at home.

She has taken ownership of her surroundings, and of us.  Everything is hers.  When she sees our house, she blurts out, "My house!"  The car, the t.v., the cat, all belong to her.  She has filled up our space with such vibrancy and excitement.  She is an explosion of life and joy.  At times it seems that only mere moments have passed, and then at other moments it feels as if thousands of years bloom out of each second.

The toddler that I had to stoop when assisting her walk, now runs around unaided.  The days of quite contemplation and one word phrases have been replaced with, "Come on, Daddy. Chase you me!"  There is no more bilingual begging to discern what she wants or needs.  She just tells us now.  She says things like, "Stallberwy Millk," and "Play wit me."  So much has changed in the last year.

I have changed in the last year.  Each day I learn a bit more about my capacities toward selfishness and toward love.  I doubt that I would have been able to see the depth of my own selfishness apart from having children.  Children truly need in a way that adults do not.  To rise to the occasion, and meet that need a parent must examine their priorities.  Once selfishness is exposed, there is only two routes one can take.  One can either combat selfishness, and put the needs of others first.  Or they could embrace the selfishness.

A person who rejects selfishness, grows in love.  Some days I feel like the post-Christmas Grinch with my heart growing by three sizes. Other days it feels like my heart shrinks by six sizes.  But the presence of children has to potential to stretch people.  It has the ability to make them stronger, better, more loving, and more caring.  It can also make them snap, especially when they aren't pliable enough.  It can make them weaker, bitter, more hateful, and more selfish.  Children aren't a cure-all.  They are a catalyst.  Children are agents of change, constant and perpetual change.  They force parents to react or respond, adapt or decline.

So it is no wonder that Sophia's presence has brought about change.  The question is, "Will I rise to the challenge?"  Will I respond to her presence, and be transformed into a better person?  O Lord, I hope so.  I find myself checking my motives more and more.  I question the impact my actions and attitudes will have on her heart.  I desire to be the man God would have me to be.  Since he has blessed me with Sophia, I can only assume that fatherhood is part of his plan for shaping me.  So as I seek to shape Sophia's heart, the Lord is shaping mine.  Although we are home, I know our journey hasn't come to its end, because life is a journey, not a destination.  I hope the year (and years) ahead permits me the opportunity to grow with my daughter.  I hope more children will not be far off.  Having drank deeply of the Lord's grace, I yearn for more.

Snot for the Weak of Stomach

Tending to a sick child can be extremely demanding.  There is the emotional stress of watch your little one suffer through fever, chills, and vomiting among other things.  There is also the side effects the sickness has on the child's temperament which in turn can cause adverse side effects in the worried and worn caregiver.  There is also the accompanying sleep deprivation that often occurs with illness.  Yet, the process of taking care of Sophia, who has had  a fever and a cough since early this morning, has me wondering.

Part of me is wondering if there is an analogy that can be drawn between a parent's struggle with a sick child, and God's providential care for his children.  I know that God doesn't worry, because he knows all things.  I also  know that God doesn't get wore out, nor are his responses determined by the disposition of his children.  But at some level I can't help but feel that some aspect of care giving is a reflection of God's care for his children.  I know God loves us and cares for us.  I know we love our children and care for them.  But does the comparison stop there?  Is the connection deeper?

This experience and previous ones like it have me thinking that difficult circumstances have a greater potential for growth in love and Christlikeness than less difficult circumstances.  It is easy enough to care for someone when everything is going well and the two of you are getting along like peaches and creme.  However, when the rules change and a battle of wills begin, it takes greater effort to provide the appropriate care.

Once the decision to love is made, difficult circumstances cause a stretching effect.  The commitment forces one to pursue every appropriate option in order to demonstrate their love to the other person.  As a person cares for another who is dependent upon them, they are forced to make a choice.  They will either refuse to render the care necessary, they will render the necessary care without any attachment, or they will render the necessary care with the appropriate attachment.  The last choice is the best choice, because it is the choice that Christ made.  But when we choose to follow him in making that choice, we are stretched beyond ourselves, and learn to love in a deeper more meaningful way.

Sickness if never welcomed, especially when it attacks one of our loved ones, but the lessons that sickness can teach us should be welcomed.  We should realize that Christ has placed us in his school to teach us to love like him.  He wants us to have compassion on the weak and needy.  He wants us to love like him.  May be we will learn those lessons without difficulty, but I doubt we'd learn them as quickly or with a more lasting impression.  Hardship leaves a mark.  If we go through it with Christ, in his power and for his glory, the mark will have positive, long lasting implications.

God is Good

"Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever" (Ps. 136:1, ESV).

Here the psalmist reminds us that the Lord is worthy of continual praise. Gratitude should be the heart response of every believer. We should have a song of thanksgiving always issuing from our hearts, because the Lord is good and his steadfast love endures forever.

What does it mean to say that God is good? The concept of God's goodness can be fleshed out as we draw on what he has revealed of himself through the Scriptures. We know that God cannot tempted with evil, he cannot lie, and he cannot break his word. We know that by his very nature he defines righteousness; God can only do what is right. God is perfect in all way imaginable. He is holy and merciful, just and kind, all-powerful and gentle. God's goodness is captured in his willingness to rescue his people. He longs for their good and his glory.

Closely related to his goodness, actually inseparable from, is God's steadfast love. His love is loyal and true. It is unshakable. The love that God has revealed by sending Christ into the world to die for sinners, is non-retractable. God cannot revoke it, not because he is compelled by some outward force, but because he cannot violate who he is. God is love, and he demonstrates his love toward us through Christ's atoning death. As Paul reminds us nothing can remove his love from us (see Rom 8:31-39).

In light of these truths it is fitting that we thank the Lord. He is worthy of all praise, honor, and glory. His goodness is unquestionable, as is his love. His love endures forever, and upon this rock we must build our trust. His loving goodness are our refuge in the storm, and our joy in the day of blessing. So, "Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever."